Bad mom jeans

I was walking down the street with my little one and my eyes landed on a woman. She was in a state of haggard that I've only seen on life time movies. As her little one bounced playfully along in his stroller the poor woman struggled to hold up the suitcases under her eyes while feigning a smile at a passerby though she looked as if she would collapse at any moment. In her jeans which were a size too small in the waist but a size too big in the butt she self concsiously adjusted her shirt as two twenty somethings in skinny jeans bobbed past. The poor woman was a typical mom, in typical bad mom jeans with a bad mom haircut and bad mom shoes. (I wish to pause right here for those of you unfamilar with the term and clarify that "bad mom" is not a reflection on parenting skills but merely states that the clothes themselves are "not as they should be" just so we're clear) I wanted to hug her, give her some reassurance, hell buy her a cup of coffee. As i inched closer I was struck by a frightening revelation. I was staring at my reflection in a store window. Who the heck was this woman and what did she do with the hip trendy milf I swore I was going to be??? Somewhere along the line I missed the memo about caring for my child AND myself. Healthy dinners turned into trips through the drive through. Hair appointments gave way to playdates. Manicures were replaced by...actually they weren't replaced but what's the point in getting a manicure if your hands are immersed in dishwater and diapers during all of your waking hours? Basically I gave up on glamour and pretty much gave up on me. On the brightside however my child remains traffic-stopping adorable and is the cleanest and most coordinated one year old you will ever lay eyes on. So what's the solution? How do you balance caring for "them" and caring for you? How do you find time to fix dinner AND fix your hair? What is the cutoff for maternity jeans when your regular ones dont fit and you can't buy new ones? How are you supposed to shave your legs while deflecting the toys, spoons, and various household objects your little one is trying to throw into the toilet? How can you be a mom AND a person? What you don't have the answers? O crap, you thought I did? Give me a minute i'll work on it and get back to you.